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dear 15 year old kelly

June 15, 2011

Dear 15-year-old Kelly,

You’re 30 right now. Take a deep breath and say it slowly. t-h-i-r-t-y. See it doesn’t sound so bad, right? Actually, sweetheart, thirty has been a really good year for you. It’s taught you a lot and you’ve spent a better part of this year reflecting on things and your life so far. I want you to know what you’ve learned.

  • Don’t be in such a hurry to grow up. You don’t ever get time back and once that year is gone, it’s gone. Youth is fleeting and you need to enjoy every blissful day. College isn’t going anywhere, life isn’t going anywhere. So stop wishing to be in another place and just enjoy the here and now.
  • You are going to get your heartbroken. It isn’t going to be fun and it is going to hurt. But don’t let it affect how you feel about yourself. You DO recover. You DO marry your soul mate. You DO find happiness. So remember that when you feel like your life is over or when said boyfriend cheats on you it is going to be okay.
  • People remember the hurtful words you use. When you get angry try to stop and remember that once you say it you can’t ever take it back. You can apologize (and you will) but people don’t always forget. When you get angry, stop and take a few minutes to calm down. Flying off at the mouth is only going to fill you with regret later.
  • Stand up for yourself! If you really want something go for it and don’t let anyone tell you no. Follow your heart when it comes to your career path. You know what you want to do and don’t let anyone talk you out of that. If you do, you will be thirty and going back to school to get another degree/certification. Trust me. You’re 15 but you already truly know what you want to do.
  • Remember you are beautiful and you don’t need to chase a thin ideal that doesn’t exist! Repeat after me: you are beautiful just the way you are. I’m serious, say that often and really believe it. It is going to save you a lot of heartache in the future.
  • Don’t be embarrassed by your religion. It’s not the norm where you live but it isn’t something to hide from. Be proud in your Jewish heritage and don’t ever apologize for it. It is you and it is a beautiful religion. Allow your experiences to teach you a hard lesson in judgement but allow it help you grow in your faith instead of letting it scare you.
  • Your parents are going to get divorced. It is going to hurt…more than anything you will have gone through up to that point. Remember they love you and it is going to work out in the end. I promise. Your parents will both find people to love and cherish and it won’t change how much they love you. Your family will grow, not in ways you would have ever imagined, but in ways that will eventually make sense.
  • And finally, my dear, remember that you are a very special little girl. You have a lot to offer this world and though your life won’t always be easy it will always be your life. It is your canvas to paint, your playground to explore and only you can make the decisions that will make your life great.

Smile more, laugh more, love harder and remember thirty is a good year for you. I will hopefully be back in another 15 years to give you all the reminders of more chapters of your life that you created so beautifully.

Love Always,

Me

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35 Comments leave one →
  1. June 15, 2011 6:57 am

    I loved this!

  2. June 15, 2011 6:58 am

    Amazing. Love ya girlie! 🙂

  3. June 15, 2011 7:04 am

    There is so much that I could tell my 15 year old self. I never embraced being Jewish either. Even though I grew up in an area with a large Jewish population, none of my friends were Jewish and I always felt left out at Christmas time.

    • June 15, 2011 8:03 am

      What really allowed me to embrace my religion was marrying Keith. He grew up in a much more Jewish area and was always comfortable with it. Marrying him helped me see that it isn’t something to be embarrased about. I think for me, I had some bad experiences with it as a child and it just kind of stuck with me.

  4. June 15, 2011 7:14 am

    Such a sweet post 🙂

  5. June 15, 2011 7:14 am

    Such a sweet post 🙂

  6. June 15, 2011 8:03 am

    I love this!! It’s amazing the perspective that a few years gives you!

  7. June 15, 2011 8:15 am

    This is beautiful, Kelly. Thanks for sharing!

  8. June 15, 2011 8:20 am

    Aw I loved this! I think my note to my 15-year old self would be pretty similar. It seems like you’ve been through a lot but you’ve come out much stronger on the other side so I’m so glad for that 🙂

  9. June 15, 2011 8:27 am

    I loved this post Kelly — I too would tell myself to stand up for yourself and be true to yourself — to not care so much about what others think.

  10. bakebooks permalink
    June 15, 2011 8:38 am

    I think everyone should write a letter like this. To themselves and others.

    I’m reading something now on Self-Compassion – we really have to be kinder to ourselves in order to accept ourselves or grow and change. Not beat our (my) self up and linger on regrets.

  11. June 15, 2011 9:33 am

    Wow, this is beautiful!
    I love the part about loving where you are at in life right now. It always seems like we are in a hurry to just get to that next step. Like in high school you want to be in college, then in college you want to graduate & start your career…then the next thing you know you are married & ready to start a family. It is pretty crazy how fast time FLIES. My parents always told me that it would go even faster as you got older, I never really believed them..but now it seems like time REALLY flies.

    • June 15, 2011 10:52 am

      I never believed my parents either. I always remember my Dad telling me that I needed to just enjoy growing up more because one day I was going to look back and think it went too quickly. I never understood what he meant at the time but now I totally get it. Totally.

  12. June 15, 2011 10:45 am

    Heartwarming and ful of good advice

  13. June 15, 2011 10:53 am

    That was such a touching post. It’s amazing how much you learn about life in just 15 years eh?

  14. June 15, 2011 10:56 am

    Isn’t it funny how it doesn’t seem like 15 should be that long ago? Time flies so fast…

  15. June 15, 2011 11:06 am

    Great POST!! I love it!! I seriously wish someone had written me this letter at 15….

  16. June 15, 2011 11:16 am

    I love this!

    Especially this line, “People remember the hurtful words you use.”
    I wish I had thought about that when I was 15.

  17. June 15, 2011 1:46 pm

    Loved this post Kelly. I would tell my fifteen year old self that I’d lose my passion for teaching which I dont think I’d ever believe.

  18. June 15, 2011 2:17 pm

    This is great! Think you can teach your 45 year old self anything? Write a letter to her? Or does it only work the other way around?

    • June 15, 2011 5:04 pm

      Well that’s the thing…some of these lessons are ones I still struggle with today and I need to listen to my 30 year old self to help make the most of my life for my 45 year old self. Does that make sense?

  19. June 15, 2011 2:22 pm

    I love this letter to yourself. I don’t know what I would write to my younger self…not sure I’m ready for that level of reflection. 😉

  20. June 15, 2011 5:30 pm

    This is really cool. I think everyone should write something like this for their future selves

  21. cottercrunch permalink
    June 15, 2011 8:45 pm

    this as beautiful kelly. Really, I think we all should write a letter like this.

  22. June 15, 2011 9:26 pm

    I love this! What a beautiful post with some very wise words!!!

  23. June 15, 2011 9:40 pm

    Love this!

    ps to fifteen year old Kelly: buy Apple stock……

  24. June 16, 2011 9:21 am

    Cute post!!

  25. June 16, 2011 9:12 pm

    Kell– i love this and you! Beautiful and thought provoking!

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