marriage with a newborn
Before Keith and I had a baby I used to get so upset with people who would associate a baby with the decline of marriage. I literally was adamant about how a baby would not change my marriage for the worse. We would still make time for each other, have sex, and be happy. So here we are 7 weeks post Trey and I want to update you on my thoughts about marriage with a newborn.
First, Keith and I have been together for 9 1/2 years and married for 7 1/2. The first year of dating we both had roommates but after that first year we moved in together and it’s been just us ever since. Over the years we’ve fallen into a very predictable routine that we’ve shaped our married lives around. We’ve been happy and I considered us to be a very good team.
Enter Trey. I realize now that we were not a team but rather two individuals. Two individuals who loved one another, got along and were happy. But we were not a team. We didn’t need one another to perform everyday tasks or to make it through the day.
Having a baby has absolutely positively changed our marriage. I realize now we are a team. Now we operate as a twosome not as individuals. For example, every night Keith feeds Trey his bottle while I pump, or Keith takes Trey while I take a shower and maybe even shave my legs (ha!). I depend on Keith to get normal everyday things done. That is the definition of teamwork. Having a baby has brought new meaning to how much we need one another and that has strengthened our marriage.
Second, seeing Keith as a dad is amazing!! As Trey gets older we both get more confident. I’m amazed at how much more confident we are now at just 7 weeks versus when we brought him home from the hospital. Knowing that Keith is a daddy makes him oh so sexy in my opinion. Finding your husband sexy is never bad for a marriage. 😉😍
Do I miss it just being us? Yes and no. Yes because it was easy. We went to dinner when we wanted, did what we wanted, plans were easy to make and we didn’t have to factor anyone else in. But now that we have Trey I feel like something was missing and Trey has completed our family. Me, Keith, Trey and Bella are a family and I wouldn’t change one thing about it. It’s perfect and hard and messy and the best thing we’ve ever done. And we’re doing it together.
So to all those people who wanted me to know how much my marriage would change…you’re right. It did change. It changed a lot but it changed for the better and Keith and I wouldn’t have it any other way.